fire day

kesal

susah mulu yang ada hari gini

pengennya swearing2 mulu, kesal, kesal, kesal

hiks


silent and swallow, puih, i'm bored huh!

frozen fire. GUE BETE! yang kenal ga usah baca daripada tersinggung.

Kesal!

Shit!

Waking up in hurry is so terrible. I thought I’d have Semantics second Exam today –damn- it made me -klip- open my eyes like an awaken vampire. How ridiculous it was! I didn’t notice the ‘correct’ schedule; it must take place on Thursday, not on Tuesday (Today!).

It was so annoying to remember that living longer in Solo will spend more money that I Am lack of now -Shit!-

“Could you live with 50 thousands rupiahs a week?” someone asked me maybe one or two months ago.

I replied, “Of, course I can!”

Exactly I can! That is the amount of my pocket money a month, you know ha?!

Anyone, Could you live with that damn amount of money?

Lol

Someone –let’s call some1 as a friend of mine- complaint about pocket money.

“God, I need my grant. A have no more money. I need it so much. When will it come?”

Damn complaint. Som1 said it, then what? Several minutes later som1 ate with wonderful portion and level of food, even more than normal times. Oh… what a shitty shit som1 talked about! Complaining and complaining, that’s what people do in life.

Can you look at me huh? I’m livin’ in harder finance situation than you do! It’s so boring to hear such complain. I wanna shut your mouth and defeat your words actually, but I will never do it. Doesn’t it sound pathetic for me to defeat such silly ridiculous complain?

Do you know how boring you are?

Shut!

Shit!

Shit!

I can’t stop swearing! I’m on fire!

I hate ones having many words but having no works- I’m one of them maybe. I’m trying to minimize my words as I couldn’t works well.

Damn

Having teaching practice is not so pleasant for me. You know what?

I should pay for this damn practice!! I will work like a slave in the name of education under a formal rights and agreement! Damn! Teaching bad guys will be like a hell!

200 thousands rupiahs for that knowledge, experience, and HELL?! And after all, I have to ‘give something’ what the so called as souvenir’ alias kenang-kenangan. It’s wasting money! God! Every-damn-things are done in the name of ‘GPA’ or ‘lecture’ or ‘final mark’ or ‘damn sake of education’!

God damn it! Hey, the one decided this policy, have you ever thought of this pathetic student? Don’t say “If you want to get knowledge, you have to pay this tuition. That’s the consequences, right?”

Bener-bener bikin pusing!

Yes I’m a ‘money-oriented’ girl! So what? Earning money is not easy, everybody knows that, shit!

God… send me your angels of welfare, please…!

Kasihan ayahku nih, satu orang nanggung empat lambung dan dua otak kecil yang makan pendidikan. HE has to work harder and harder just to get a few of money to feed our brain –my and my brother’s brain-

Dah gaji kecil, apa-apa pada naik, nyokap juga susah hemat –makanya aku juga susah hemat, it’s like a genetic factor, yucks!- ditambah kebutuhan makin banyak aja, bayar ini lah, itu lah!

Pusing.

I can’t do anything to help him!! Help!!!

My head is burnt! Pusing gue!

Rasanya –kadang-kadang- gue pengen nonjok pengemis regular di kampus. Hey! Old guy, look at my father or grandfather, they are earning money by ‘biting their knees’!

Shit! Jangan harap gue mau sering ngasih-ngasih orang yang kerjaannya minta-minta duit –setengah maksa lagi- dan ngejadiin minta-minta sebagai profesi! I’m exactly sure that his ‘paycheck’ is even more than my pocket money for a day (or a week?). enak aja!!!

I thought I’d be happy though I live in a very –ngepress- life like a poor princess, as long as I have happy family it wouldn’t be a big deal. It was a mistake, I was wrong; it’s not about money, pleased life in luxurious or something, but it was about beliefe. I believe happiness may come without ‘adequate property, but with enough love. Dulunya aku pikir aku bisa bahagia walo nggak sekaya the black-listed man, asal orang tua bisa tersenyum dan bersyukur, tapi sekarangt semua udah berubah. Aku bener-bener jarang mendengar atau melihat tanda-tanda bersyukur di rumah. Seandainya saja bisa lebih menunjukkan tanda-tanda bersyukur.... gini aja udah nandain gue nggak bersyukur, iya nggak? Pusing!

I’ve never seen my father’s smiling for this two weeks, we’re seldom having joke again. No laugh. It’s so… damn!

Aku nggak pengen pulang ke rumah! Bisa-bisa yang ada di kepalaku Cuma mikirin cara ngebunuh orang!

I’m used to live with this pattern: silent and swallow.

Do you know what makes me stay living this life up to now?

REVENGE

Kalo orang tanya apa cita-citamu, mungkin aku bingung jawabnya.

Tapi kalao orang tanya apa tujuanmu, hm.. I’ll give them a ‘smile’ means REVENGE.

Hahahahah!

Kalo aku punya Death Note, sudah pasti aku bakal jadi EVIL melebihi KIRA.

Hahahahahahah

uah.....
tugas sajagat arat-arat, puyeng....
how boring this semester is!
hh....
bbm mundak, bbm naik, dilematis sih
tapi berhubung masih tergolong rakyat kecil, ya... kena imbasnya beneran deh!
sangune tetep tapi harga2nya pada naik, bua.... mumet nih, menteri keuangan republik langit lagi mumet ngutak-atik rapbn